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Apr. 18th, 2007 @ 07:28 am Rant #17
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macca
abromeds:
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From:coocoo4oc_slash
Date:February 7th, 2009 02:58 pm (UTC)

Re: OK, I will try and be calm and collected so that Abro does not ban me from the comm...

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I think one thing that nobody seems to have noticed or felt the need to mention is dating/engagement/marriage/etc. perspective.

You mention the fact that the way that Paul and Linda operated with one another is similar to the way you and your husband operate with one another which may have been influenced by your parents. So, you, like others it seems, obviously have the perspective of someone who feels that their marriage was ideal.

But I, once again, like others, have the perspective of someone who feels that even in the closest marriages it seems only reasonable that each person have something to call their own, separate from each other. Not secret, but separate.

"The fact that you even wrote this rant leads me to beleive that you have never been in a relationship like Paul and Linda's."

You're right. I haven't. I couldn't be. I would become severely claustrophobic in a relationship like that. Personally, I would need to have my own thing. Something that I did by myself. Or else I'd feel surrounded and I need my independence. It's this perspective that causes me to look at their marriage and think, "Well, why can't she be a photographer on the road with her family instead of a 'musician'?" That's purely subjective, I know. But it still puts me on the side of those who think there was no reason for her to be in the music.

"I think they have set a model example of what familes should be, and that if more people would focus on raising their kids, we wouldn't have as many societal problems with our children."

Now, I see that and I think that you're implying that a marriage between two people who are not, for lack of a better phrase, "all up in each other's business" would produce, at best, somewhat unhealthy children. If my assessment is true then I want to point out that having a young girl watch her parents have to drop their own interests just to 'support' their spouse isn't exactly a great image either.

The choices they made were theirs' and theirs' alone and you're right. People should have their families as priorities in their lives. I just don't agree with the idea that "...if more women would follow Linda's example, the youth of today would not face nearly as many problems as they currently do (ie gangs, violence, rampant depression...the list could go on)."

Families first? Sure.

Kids = Priority? Great.

Them not being able to pursue their hobbies at the same time? Not so much.